Not your Daddy’s recap 8/22/2020

Hello y’all! I don’t know about you but this team has me feeling weary right down to my bones. This week I went to an interactive aquarium with Kid 3 and swam with the stingrays. It is life-changing. We need some of their energy. We’ve lost six straight now, and I have no confidence that tonight won’t be Number Seven as we face Seattle. We need a spark in our bats. Our top four rank 28th in batting average in the MLB. If we lose tonight I think it’s time to call in the young guys from the Alternate site. Bring me Leody. Bring me DeMarcus. Heck, suit up my dog and bring her too! Bring ’em all!

If you’re new to Not Your Daddy’s, welcome to Not Your Daddy’srecap 8/22/2020. Grab a drink. We do things a little different around here. Don’t expect a play-by-play, and do know I will say what’s on my mind. And tonight I’m not only weary I’m fiery about this team and how we’re playing.

Solak is starting us off at the plate. His offense has been slacking. He’s facing Sheffield, who has been hot and has only allowed one earned run in his last two starts. Solak strikes out swinging. Santana bounces one to third and is thrown out at first. Frazier is on with a single after hitting a shot past third. Gallo’s up and it’s time for a Joey Jack. Nope, not quite far enough and the inning is over.

Lyles is on the mound for the Rangers. He strikes Crawford out in three pitches. Haggerty singles one into center field. Lewis is batting .354? Yikes! He hits one that bounces into the outfield and now Seattle has runners on first and third with one out. Seager hits one caught in center but it’s enough to get Haggerty home and the Mariners strike first. Nola lines one past Odor and they’re back at first and third. Trevino doesn’t contain a breaking ball from Lyles and Nola moves to second. White smacks one past Frazier resulting in a two out double and two more score. Fraley hits it to Odor, and is thrown out at first.

Did you know stingrays can grow wider than Gallo is tall?

End of one: Texas 0, Seattle 3.

Trevino is up and brings his .346 average. Not this time, he’s out at first. Odor flies out to right. IKF thrown out at first. Our bats are sagging. Woodward looks as weary as I feel.

Lopes strikes out. Long pops to IKF. Crawford is on first after Odor stops the ball behind second. Haggerty hits one on the ground to Odor and is thrown out at first. We make it out of the inning without any more runs scoring.

Stingrays are closely related to sharks. Y’know what, I’d swim with the sharks, too, if it meant we’d score.

End of two: Texas 0, Seattle 3.

Sheffield hits Refsnyder in the foot so we get a runner at first. Heineman flies out to right. Solak bounces one into empty left right field and we now have runners on first and third. Santana hits one way out and it’s enough to get Refsnyder home. We’ll score at least one this game. Frazier flies out to left.

Lewis hits one through for a single and is now two for two. Seager drops one into center and there are runners on first and second. Nola hits one up the middle and Lewis scores while Seager advances to second. White blasts one out and three more score. It’s already seven to one and we don’t have an out yet this inning. Fraley hits a double into right. Hearn is warming up in the pen. Pitch eludes Trevino and Fraley moves up to third. Lopes bounces infield and we get the out at first but Fraley scores. Another bouncer to Odor and Long is out. Crawford flies out to center.

The tails of stingrays have a spine. Can we grow one?

End of three: Texas 1, Seattle 8

Gallo strikes out on three pitches. Trevino singles up the middle and I can’t be happier for him and the way he’s playing. Odor strikes out. IKF hits a single to left and we have runners on first and second. Refsnyder strikes out.

Lyles is back. Solak makes a fantastic catch and Haggerty is out. Lewis doubles to left. Seager flies out, again to Solak. Solak seems to be the only one working this inning. Nola bounces to third and Frazier throws the out at first.

Stingray tails also have a venomous barb. You can trim the barb like fingernails. I like swimming with stingrays, not getting stung by stingrays. The Rangers also seem to have had their barbs trimmed.

End of four: Texas 1, Seattle 8

Heineman’s turn at bat again. He flies out to center. Santana out at first. I dozed off for a second and we somehow have a runner at second but it doesn’t matter because the third out ends the inning without anyone scoring.

Hearn is in and he faces White. Hearn strikes him out. Hearn strikes out Fraley. Lopes flies out to center. A good inning, if only we could get our bats working.

There’s a stingray in Fort Worth who only has a two inch tail and they call him “Nubs.” “Nubs” also describes our at bats.

End of five: Texas 1, Seattle 8

Gallo is up for the third time. And he strikes out. Trevino doubles and is the one bright spot of this game so far. Odor pops one into left foul that is caught. IKF collects a walk. There’s a conference at the mound and Refsnyder may be the last batter Sheffield faces. Refsnyder flies out just short of the wall.

Long is the first batter up this inning for Seattle. Hearn strikes him out! Hearn strikes out Crawford. Haggerty drops one into center for a single. Lewis is up and he’s three for three. The umpire takes a foul ball off the shoulder but in the end Hearn walks Lewis. Runners at first and second with two outs. Hearn strikes out Seager to get us out of this inning.

Stingrays use their electro-sensors to find their prey. Maybe electro-sensors would help us find the ball.

End of six: Texas 1, Seattle 8

I’m not sure why I’m even reporting about our at-bats anymore. Heineman thrown out at first. Solak out at first. Santana hustles out a double. Frazier flies out to left. Snore.

Chavez in to pitch. Nola with a base hit to right. White strikes out. Chavez walks Fraley and they’re on first and second. Lopes strikes out. Why is Chavez wearing his practice jersey? Automatic double for Long as the ball bounces over the wall, so Nola scores and Fraley moves to third. Crawford flies out to Gallo.

Stingrays are generally inactive, like just like our offense.

End of seven: Texas 1, Seattle 9

Fletcher is in to pitch. We do a whole lot of nothing at the plate.

Garcia to pitch. Haggerty strikes out. Lewis collects a walk. Base hit for Seager. Both runners advance on a wild pitch. Nola gets on via error by Frazier. Bases loaded with one out. Seattle hits one up the middle and we can only get the out at second so Lewis scores. Does the score matter anymore? Fraley strikes out.

Stingray skin is used in Japanese swords. I wonder if we..no, never mind. Don’t hurt stingrays, even if you’re about to lose seven in a row.

End of eight: Texas 1, Seattle 10

Blah blah blah nothing happens and the game is over.

Not even ‘rays can lessen the sting of losing a seventh straight.

End of game: Texas 1, Seattle 10

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